Royal Wedding

So despite a lingering bout of unwellness, I chose to stay up all night so I could watch the royal wedding. Most people would have gone to bed and set their alarm clocks. I'm too self aware to make what sounds like such a sensible decision. I'd just hit the snooze and go back to bed. If I had any chance in hell of being awake at 5:00 a.m., it had to be an all-nighter.

I watched a PVRed Toy Story 3, drank a 4:30 coffee and catnapped on the couch with the lights and TV on to prevent full-on sleep. And here I am a little before 11:00 in the morning feeling only slightly worse for wear. So I'd say it was worth it.

And there are the cynics out there who decry the royal wedding as a waste of our collective energy (Waves at McPal) but I can't help being thoroughly charmed by the whole thing. I suppose I could explain what it is about the royal wedding that pleases me.

1. It really brought the people of the UK together. The royal family is an enduring smbol of their history, and without any real political power, their influence is only so great as the people will allow it to be. Hence, I think, the affection. They've gone from being the government to being a living cultural relic. They're no more relevant than Japan's geisha, but people like indulging in the more asthetically pleasing aspects of their country's culture from time to time.

2. Speaking of asthetically pleasing, look at all those hats. I've always loved a good hat, but have rarely felt equal to the task of leaving the house in one. I fawn over them in stores, look at them online and fantasize about various hats I would pair with my dresses. But it's hard to pull off a good hat in this North American society without being looked at as an eccentric. And it's not that I mind people who know me thinking I'm odd due to my personality, as often happens. But I kind of feel squemish at strangers staring at me, which they would do were I to sport the sort of hats I covet.

3. It's of historical interest. I wasn't alive for Charles and Di, but I've seen the footage countless times. I kind of wanted to put in the effort to "be there" for this one. William will in my lifetime be my country's head of state. It's an international news story an estimated 2 billion people watched. It's enjoyable to be a part of that and to share a collective experience.

4. If my mom were alive, she'd have watched it. Maybe we would have arranged to watch it together. My aunt/godmother was all ready for it. In fact, I called her last night and her first question was whether I was all ready for the royal wedding. It was sort of a small bonding thing for her and I. She loves the royal family and so did my mom. She would have married around when Diana did, would have been pregnant with me around the time Diana was pregnant with William and now Mom's firstborn would have been married the same year as Diana's was. She adored Princess Di. I think this whole affair and it's timing would have really made her happy.

And my general impressions of the wedding itself were good. It was very restrained. Definitely elegant, but not over the top whatsoever. It was formal, traditional and understated compared to the passion and fervor the English had for the event. And considering the recession, I thought the modesty and simplicity were respectful. Plus now there's this needed boost to the UK's economy, and the royal family pretty much foot the bill for what's now going to be a huge tourism advertisement for London, England. Also, they all got the day off. Everybody wins. Not bad at all.

And, most importantly, I just really love love.

Up In The Air

I wrote this in the air yesterday. Only now am I rested enough to get online and post it.

I'm writing this from aboard the plane. I'm on my way home. But I'm only on the first flight to Chicago. It's a long way yet. I haven't eaten. The clock says it's 7:30 pm. That hardly seems possible. The whole weekend hardly seems possible.

I met my friends. And I loved them all as well as I did on the boards. And those who weren't from the boards or knew what the boards even were couldn't understand how we all managed to come together in real life. It's was an exercise in patience trying to make them understand and even so it was met with little success. It's just another thing we share: No one in our lives really gets it.

As for chronicling the wedding, I don't even know where to start. Even starting at the beginning seems impossible. There's too much to cover. But I'll try, and I'll do it in point form. And I'll use the screen handles instead of their real names for the sake of privacy.

* When I arrived at the airport, I met up with Lyn and folkimp. Folkimp drove us to our hotel and we drank wine and got to know each other better. We then met up with Anon and JT (the bride and groom) and the wedding party and went out drinking. Lyn and I woke up in hell the next morning and forced our asses out of bed to get hamburgers.

* Folk got into a car accident en route to our hotel the day of the wedding. She was taken to the ER with a concussion. She missed the wedding and we missed her. It was a total bummer that she couldn't make it. It was the worst text message to receive, the first chunk being along the lines of, "Hey, got into a car accident…" But she's alright.

* Jillraye (from the boards) came to our hotel with champagne and picked us up. It was my first time meeting her and she was just like I thought she would be.

* At the wedding we sat at the back and giggled and gossiped. Anon came down the aisle looking like a renaissance queen. The pastor started the service, a very old school biblical reading about a wife's servitude to her husband. The three of us in the back started laughing because we thought he was kidding. Turns out he wasn't and we felt sheepish.

* After the wedding we met up with pinstripe (from the boards) and her boyfriend, who was lovely, and incidentally wearing a pinstripe suit. We all sat at the same table and my camera died, after an afternoon of taking lacklustre pictures. I pretty much need a new camera. I also met OCDB (from the boards) and his wife.

* I caught the bouquet. It's actually the third or fourth bouquet I've caught in my life. I'm not sure what that means. I was actually well at the back behind everyone, figuring it wouldn't come my way there. Then it did. So I pranced over and claimed it. Then of course everyone wanted to know when the Dude and I were getting married, and for my information, they wanted to come for board reunion II a la Canada.

* At the back of the venue, mike_a (from the boards) got into a wrestling match with another guest. The cops showed up and… watched. Mike lost. I'd never seen a wrestling match at a wedding before, and it certainly did enhance the evening.

* JT held an after party at his place and we stayed till 2:00 a.m. A guest kept asking me to sing O Canada in French. I did once, and was then treated to a loud but highly enthusiastic rendition of the Star Spangled Banner. The cops showed up there too to ask that we either have less fun outside or more fun inside. A gentleman friend of Jill's showed up, one she had mentioned on the boards, who was good enough to drive us back to the hotel.

Lyn's dad dropped me off at the airport today. It was ridiculously easy compared to Friday and I had excess time to kill.

I've had good times at weddings before, but this was really special to me. Everyone was fun, my long-time friends were there, the whole weekend felt like quality time. And the cake was delicious.

I feel like I've tumbled around in a cement mixer. All the drinking, the sporadic eating, the time changes and delayed sleep have kicked my arse. But I'd do it all again. I'd do it all again feeling as tired and rundown as I do now. The only thing I'm sad about it that it's over, and it's hard to say if such a gathering of us all will ever happen again, or moreover on such a large scale. I hope so.

And the captain is telling us our flight is coming to a close shortly. The first leg of my trip home is nearly complete. I can't wait to see the Dude. I think the only thing that would have made it better would have been to introduce him to them all.

Three Weddings and a...

Turns out the upcoming May 15-16 weekend is busier than the May 24. Wild. That is the weekend I'm going to a wedding in California. It's also the weekend of The Clothing Show, my road hockey team's charity tournament, Mayfest (Which I was hoping to sort out something with my job to distribute surveys to the deaf), and who knows what else will pop up. Even a coworker of mine wanted that weekend off, but two of us in our job description already got to it first.

Crazy. But out of all those things, the wedding it is, and I'm happy with my choice. 12 days until I leave.

I've not been to too many weddings in previous years. I went to a very good friend's wedding in 2004 and was her maid of honour. I went to a cousin's wedding in 2007. In 2008, I went to the Dude's stepbrother's wedding, and a friend of mine who finally was able to marry her fiance after living in Saudi Arabia without him for pretty much forever. I missed attending as a guest to one wedding in 2005 because I had appendicitis, and another wedding I was actually banned from attending in 2007.

(The last one was Buddy B's brother. Back in the day, I told the guy he need to shave his '80s moustache, cut his '80s haircut and quit wearing muscle shirts. He begrudgingly took all this advice and started getting female attention. He then got a nipple ring and I think a tattoo. Anyhoo, he's never cared much for me, despite the good advice. So when Buddy B was dateless for the shindig and I was going to go, it was kiboshed. Sometimes it strikes me as odd that I've actually been barred from attending a wedding.)

Anyway, this year will hold three of them, two of which will require extensive travel, and two of which are family deals. Some people hate weddings. Personally, I really enjoy them. You eat, you dance, you drink, there's cake and two people in love are now married. What's not to like?

The speeches. Actually, speeches can be a real buzz kill. But then it also depends on the speech. I once watched a man make AA amends to his son during a speech. Another time I watched a bridesmaid spill the beans that the couple had sleepovers prior to marriage in front of the very religious grandparents. I mean, you never know what's going to happen.

You'd think at my age I'd have more friends getting engaged and married, but I don't. I have two friends hitched. All the others are in relationships, yes, but engaged? Not so much. And I like that. Oh, I'd be happy for any of my friends getting married. But I like the lack of urgency the people I care about are approaching this milestone with. No one seems in a hurry. But I suppose were we all to hit our 30s, some of us may change our tunes. That happens.

Mexican boo-urns

You know when what you want for another person and what would be convenient for you don't match up? This is the pitfall of the destination wedding.

My cousin who just got engaged has been like a sister to me. We grew up together, went to the same school and we were always spending the night at each other's house and spending time together at least once a week or so. My mom and her sister were best friends, so my cousins were always around.

Now they all live in BC. I see them once a year. My cousin has a number of people who would have to travel in from Ontario for her wedding, so she figured why not get married somewhere cooler than BC? Mexico.

Unfortunately, Mexico would be double the cost. It's also not a trip I'd want to make without the Dude. A romantic resort for a wedding and then an extended stay? Yeah, not doing that solo. I'd wind up spending a lot of time alone. Not that reading in sunny weather and getting drunk by a pool on my own is undesireable, I just don't think I could use a week of that. Then there's paying the singles rate, which often means one person paying close to the cost of two people per room so the hotel doesn't "lose" money when a solo traveller books a stay.

See, my cousin and her fiancee are trying to win a dream destination wedding. If they succeed, the location will be so far out of our price range, that I feel a little woozy thinking about it. They would also win four couples' stay with them, but she and her fiancee no doubt have various other people they would want to share that prize with.

So bummer. I love weddings, and seeing people I love get married means a lot to me. Her wedding in particular ranks up there with my brother. She wants this kind of wedding, so I want it for her. I just know that there's a good chance I simply won't make it there. If they don't win, the place they choose could still well be out of my range. The Dude is just starting out his career and doesn't have a ton of money to blow on a Mexican vacation. I don't have money to blow to pay singles rates on a Mexican vacation.

Le sigh. I suppose it'll figure itself out, just likely in such a way that I'll only be there in spirit and I'll have to rely on pictures to experience a day I'd always looked forward to being there for.

Mellowed

I think I'm at a point in my life where I want to keep things simple. I'm not entirely sure why that is. I used to get warm fuzzies over the thought of being made a fuss over. Not so much these days.

If I were to get married, I think I'd like to bypass a lot of the typical stuff and just get it done with some friends and family present. Maybe I've heard too much being made of the whole deal. It's not that I don't think marriage is important. It is. It's just that half the people who do it get divorced. And then they have second and third weddings and all with the same hooplah... it's just not that big of a decision, it seems to me, if you'll do it with more than one person and you can take it back later.

And for me, I've been living a la sin for two years now, just about, and taking that step wouldn't dramatically change my life, other than allowing for more future planning and some more merging of finances. I think I'd feel stupid throwing anything big. And that's odd because I never feel this way about anyone else's wedding, no matter how long they've been together, lived together, have had a child etc. Just me.

Same thing with a baby. Some women get pregnant and from that point forward they're showing every jerk in a three-metre radius their sonogram picture, throwing their own showers, doing up an expensive baby registry in one theme and taking back stuff purchased that does not fit that theme, Twittering their labour progress and update their Facebook statuses with diaper mishaps and about 500 pictures and inviting everyone they've ever known to baby's first birthday in a gift grab blaze of glory.

Not that I ever wanted anything like that, but the more I think about it, the less "stuff" you bring into the house and the less pressure you place on yourself and everyone around you to perform to these standards of giving and attention for this whole birth thing, seems the more joyful and less overwhelming the whole thing could be.

Then there are birthdays. I'm turning 27 in a few weeks. I've been accidentally calling myself 27 here and there for a month or so now, so this is not a big deal birthday. All I want is my friends and some good food. Whatever happens, happens.

Past birthdays were harder on me, and after several disappointments I started inadvertently measuring them as how loved or liked I was, which the answer seemed to say to me: not much. But the less importance I put on the day, the more I tend to enjoy it. This year the Dude is going to sort something out, and whatever it is, I'll be happy with it.

Funny. Maybe I'm getting old. Not like old-old, but mellowing out. And maybe that's a difference when you do things for the celebratory purposes and the fantasy, and when you want to do things because you want to actually go through with them. I think I'm at a stage where I'm ready to buckle down and actually think about these choices in a real way.

This isn't some sort of blogging announcement about my upcoming shotgun wedding and I'm due in March or anything. But I have been thinking about this change in me lately.